alternative relationships, lifestyles & practices

cross dressing

With the much-increased freedom we enjoy these days, especially in a big city like London, we are able to explore many sexual and other practises, including that of cross-dressing. Indeed many people now define themselves by their sexual preferences, be they straight, gay, bisexual, lesbian or transgender. But this is only the start of it. There are also innumerable activities and fetishes on the (sexual) menu and it’s sometimes difficult to find one’s place in this often somewhat clinical world. For instance, do you cross-dress because you are a transvestite, transsexual or for reasons of fetish? Are you completely comfortable with what you do? How does your cross-dressing impact on other activities or situations? Please set up an appointment to see me if you have problems integrating cross-dressing into your life or if it is perhaps at the heart of a relationship issue(s). Whatever your thing, it is most important for you to come to terms with who you are and what you do.

fetishes

In medical and psychological terms a 'fetish' is an object, or part of the body, that becomes the focus of sexual desire, without which the fetishist cannot achieve orgasm. The word is however more often used to mean any general sexual turn-on. Some people, for example, will quite happily admit to having a "leather fetish" but they don't necessarily mean that they must always incorporate leather into their sex sessions or that they can't function without it. It usually just means that they sometimes like to use leather to provide an extra kick. Pretty much anything can be placed in a sexual context. Common examples are feet, lingerie, boots, high heel shoes, rubber and leather, cigars, water sports and scat. Some fetishes are probably more socially acceptable than others, but mostly they are practised safely between responsible consenting adults.

While many people simply enjoy their fetishes and manage to incorporate them successfully into their lifestyle and relationships, others have some difficulty coming to terms with either their own or their partner’s kinks. It might be because they still find them a bit shocking, allow them to effect their self esteem, or they may negatively affect their lives in other ways, causing a degree of isolation or maybe even harming an important relationship. For some people, a fetish could even be the cause of them not being able to find or keep a partner. Contact me if your fetishes are causing more distress than pleasure. They should add an exciting edge to our lives, not be disruptive.

gay issues

Despite the fact that the gay population of London has been estimated at somewhere between half-a-million and one-and-a-half million people, real support for gay men and lesbian women is certainly not yet what it should be. It is still often quite difficult to take various problems to professionals who, even if not privately bigoted, frequently have little understanding of the gay world, let alone any of those more specialised practises such as Fetish, Master/slave, Cross-dressing or SM activities.  Even many gay therapists have little experience of some of these areas.  As a bisexual, lesbian, gay or transgender person, issues that you might feel a need to seek assistance with could also include those to do with:

Ideally such concerns should not be dealt with in isolation, but rather in the context of your life as a whole, no matter your lifestyle.  Please set up an appointment to see me so that together we can begin to resolve whatever might need to be resolved

sexual addiction

Sexual addiction is the name given to a pattern of sexual behaviour that is out of control.

Sexual addiction tends to be used, often unknowingly, to anaesthetise shame, low self worth, core loneliness, anger, stress and anxiety. It is a pattern of behaviour that closely parallels the medical diagnostic criteria for substance dependence. It need not be like this. Please set up a time to see me if this is an issue in your life and we will work at putting your life back into harmony, without losing any of its fun.

sexual issues

With the increased sexual freedom we enjoy these days, especially in a big city like London, we are able to explore many previously unmentioned alternatives. Indeed many people now define themselves by their sexual preferences, be they straight, gay, bisexual, lesbian or transgender. But this is only the start of it. There are also innumerable activities and fetishes on the sexual menu and it’s sometimes quite difficult to find one’s place in this brave new world. How does one be both a slave and still live a professional life? How does one come to terms with being aroused by activities that are perhaps humiliating, aggressive or just painful and still maintain one’s self esteem? Please set up an appointment to see me if you are having problems with sexual issues such as desire or performance or if you are trying to integrate a sexual activity, identity or fetish into your life and existing relationships. It is most important to work through these issues rather than to just sweep them under the carpet.

sm issues

With the increased sexual freedom we enjoy these days, especially in a big city like London, we are able to explore many sexual variation alternatives including SM practises. Indeed many people now define themselves by their sexual preferences, be they straight, gay, bisexual, lesbian or transgender. But this is only the start of it. There are also innumerable activities and fetishes on the sexual menu and it’s sometimes difficult to find one’s place in this sometimes clinical world. How does one be both a slave and still live a professional life? How does one come to terms with activities that are perhaps humiliating, aggressive or just painful and still maintain one’s self esteem? How do these practises impact on the rest of our lives? Please set up an appointment to see me if you are having problems with sexual issues such as desire or performance or if you are trying to integrate a sexual activity, identity or fetish into your life and existing relationships. These are important issues to work through.

social phobia

Social phobia can make life very difficult. Socialising is one of life's great pleasures, but it is denied to many people. Shyness is a natural part of growing up, but for many people it doesn't end with their teenage years. Social anxiety can persist into adulthood and indeed increase so that making friends and establishing a social circle become incredible painful if not impossible. In most cases, the heightened emotions of socialising when young condition the sufferer to respond to social events with fear, instead of excitement and pleasure. Isn’t it now time to change this? Make an appointment to see me if you need to overcome this debilitating phobia.

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